Testimonies
Given on: Sunday - April 19th, 2009Given by: Rob Rowe
On Jan. 28th, I had a doctor's appointment. I went because I had gained a lot of weight and there was a tremendous amount of swelling in my legs, arms, and belly and it was starting to reach my chest and my breathing was being affected by it. The doctor told me that the swelling was due to fluid build up from heart failure caused by the diabetes and that he could try to treat me as an out patient but I really should go to the hospital.
As I was in the hospital, I was thinking that I would only be in for 3-5 days as they got they got the fluid off. A kidney doctor came and told me that he suspected kidney damage due to the diabetes and he wanted me to have a kidney biopsy to see how intensive the damage is. He told me that kidney biopsies are a routine procedure and are done all the time but with anything they run the risks of something going wrong. I have it done and everything seemed to be fine until the next morning.
This is where my memory starts to get foggy. The next morning I woke up with the most intense pain I ever had. I remember calling for the nurse and her asking me where does it hurt and me trying to tell her where it did but the pain was so intense the only thing I can do is cry out to God. The next thing I know is that I'm being rushed to some big white room with people moving around fast and a nurse holding my hand trying to keep me calm.
The next thing that I remember is waking up and looking over and seeing my mom and realizing that my hands were strapped to the bed rails. I tried to talk but my voice was so weak it sounded like I was whispering. I had no clue what day or time it was or what had happened to me in the days since that painful morning.
The doctors told me that something went wrong with the biopsy and that I bled into my back and put pressure on my belly, stomach, and intestines. Also during the time that I don't remember, I caught pneumonia, had multiple blood transfusions, was put on a ventilator, and found out that my kidneys were failing.
I spent about what I think is about 2 and 1/2 weeks in the Critical Care Unit before they released me to the regular medical floor. The doctors told me that they were planning on sending me to a long term care hospital for another month as I got my strength and received more one on one care because I wasn't eating and had a stomach full of bileand blood but by the end of that week I was on my way home.
People have asked me what have I learned from this or what has God shown me. God has, in His infinite grace has shown me my worth. My worth not only to Him but to others too. For years I have battled with depression and the notion that I'm not worth it to anyone. Even though I grew up in a Christian home and have been in church for the majority of my life, I always had a very low outlook of myself. I remember being at a very low point a couple of days before the New Year and being confined to my room for days. On new years day though, through talking with and revealing and letting go of some things that I have held onto for years, God opened my eyes and showed me that my worth isn’t found in me but in His Son who loved me enough that he took my sin on His back. He also allowed me to see my worth to others by the outpouring of prayer and well wishes from people that know me and don't know me.
As God was reaffirming my worth in Him, He was also reaffirming my worth to body of Christ. 1 Corinthians 12 speaks about how every member of the body is important to the whole and has a specific role to play. Now that I have a better understanding of this, I can now find my place in His body. I know that I'm not the same man that I was three months ago and that is all due to God changing me to be more like the man He has formed me to be. I'm extremely thankful for Gulf Coast for being diligent in praying for me and my family. My family's faith in God has grown so much because of what He has done and is continuing to do in me.
My outlook on everything has changed since that day in January. I no longer take what I have and more importantly who I have for granted. My family and I have never been closer and more open with each other, I value all of my friendships so much more and I am no longer finding that I'm stuck in the rut of life. I know that God has so much in store fore and even though I may not know exactly what it is, I'm not going to let that stop me from pursuing Him all the days of my life. Each day and everything that comes with it truly is a gift from the Father of Lights so my prayer for all of us is that we would really see it as such.
Once again, I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for the outpouring of prayers and support that me and my family have received from you all. Words can’t express our gratitude to you all.